Hugging :)

by Nina 

When we are feeling down, we become fragile. We may shut out our peers, or pretend to be confident, or seek some consolation. Our defense is temporarily weakened and our emotions are exposed, for everyone to see, and for anyone to alter. In this state of helplessness our sensitivity swells: we are easily hurt, easily angered, but easily solaced. What we need is a reminder that we are not alone. A gesture of compassion. An exchange of kindness.

A hug.

Thought to be derived from the Old Norse term, hugga, meaning "to soothe," a soothing hug can arouse a smile or even restore a soul.

It may not heal our cuts or bruises, but it will pick us up off the ground where we fell.

It may not stop the rain, but it will bring some warmth and brightness to our day.

A hug is one of the few universal gestures of the world. A Human Unity Gesture. It is understood by all, refused by few. It is a form of intimate touch, past the holding of hands, but not quite a kiss. Its motives can vary but its underlying intentions are always the same. Along with lifting our spirits, it can also greet others, illustrate happiness, prevent goodbyes, and demonstrate affection. The act of intimately entangling your body with that of another's entails a story: for whatever reason, both of you wanted or needed or accepted this hug; for a moment, both of you trusted your life to be in the arms of someone else; for the sake of the embrace, both of you were willing to let another body come close to your own.

A closure of distance between two or more people (or things, perhaps), hugs combine the goodness in all of us: between friends, lovers, families, sentimental objects, and even strangers; we are the ingredients for love. Hugs bring us together and manifest it.

To hug is simple; there are no materials required. One or more persons must be willing to initiate the hug, by extending his or her arms; it is ideal to have all participants inclined to engage in the embrace, but not absolutely necessary.

Hugs come in many forms.

There is the cuddle hug.


The bear hug.


The surprise hug.


The man hug.

The group hug.


The half hug.

The squeezing hug.


The posing hug.


And the lifting hug.


On June 30th, 2004, a man known as Juan Mann began the Free Hugs Campaign...

    "I'd been living in London when my world turned upside down and I'd had to come home. By the time my plane landed back in Sydney, all I had left was a carry on bag full of clothes and a world of troubles. No one to welcome me back, no place to call home. I was a tourist in my hometown.


  Standing there in the arrivals terminal, watching other passengers meeting their waiting friends and family, with open arms and smiling faces, hugging and laughing together, I wanted someone out there to be waiting for me. To be happy to see me. To smile at me. To hug me.


  So I got some cardboard and a marker and made a sign. I found the busiest pedestrian intersection in the city and held that sign aloft, with the words "Free Hugs" on both sides.


  And for 15 minutes, people just stared right through me. The first person who stopped, tapped me on the shoulder and told me how her dog had just died that morning. How that morning had been the one year anniversary of her only daughter dying in a car accident. How what she needed now, when she felt most alone in the world, was a hug. I got down on one knee, we put our arms around each other and when we parted, she was smiling.


  Everyone has problems and for sure mine haven't compared. But to see someone who was once frowning, smile even for a moment, is worth it every time."

Juan Mann started a movement. What seemed to be a strange act put on by a strange man was really nothing but a symbol of kindness. Humans are far too often withdrawn. We live among each other but we are separated by distance. What this man was trying to do was remind us that we are meant to interact, we are meant to impact each other's lives. We are meant to hug. 

Juan has written an e-book exploring the art of hugging and describing his experiences with his campaign. Click the link to see it.

I must admit, I've never been the most active hugger. There was a period in junior high and the beginning of high school where all the girls seemed to greet their peers with hugs. It came to a point where it all became rather silly, seeing two groups of girls, perhaps with one or two guys here and there, approaching each other and then each taking turns hugging one another. This motion of friendship was made into a trend. I accepted these hugs every time, but rarely initiated them. They were insincere. The authentic greeting hug of "I'm so glad to see you!" was buried. These clichéd hugs were only executed because they were the new "hey, what's up!"

That trend faded as we got older. Hugs are more delicate now. The real ones, at least. There are those light hugs that you give to a friend when you two share a joke or a good time, and the hugs you give out of politeness, and the hugs you give for a photo op, or a PDA-PDA – a Public Display of Affection for the Purpose of Deriving Attention.

And then there are the hugs with meaning: 

when two or more people embrace not only each other, but the moment itself; 

when the world around is put on pause, and the only things moving are the beats of your hearts pressed close together; 

when you hug freely, with the intent to spread the movement of free hugging; 

when the hug isn't an accessory, but necessary, because its participants needed the emotional boost; 

or when your happiness needs company and invites a companion to indulge in that blissful, precious time.

When we feel alone, when we need a lift, when we want to celebrate, when we want to manifest our emotions, and all we have is another person, we can create a revelation of unity.
A mutual display of openness, and acceptance.
A physical fusion of two beings, momentarily as one.
A small act of kindness. A gesture of love.

A hug.